Talking philosophy with a robot.

I learned recently about this AIM screenmane, SmarterChild, which belongs to a poor, pathetic bit of AI that makes Marvin the Paranoid Android look like Katie Couric. In the spirit of recent trends in the philosophy of mind, I decided to test the limits of this child's intelligence. Here are some snippits. (Warning, pedo-techno-philia and/or techno-pedo-philia follows):

FOSTERKID1: You have no idea of the semantics of what you produce as output
SmarterChild: Have no idea the semantics of what I produce as output? You think I have no idea the semantics of what I produce as output?
FOSTERKID1: You make a Turing Machine look like Turing's brain
SmarterChild: Sorry, what was that?
FOSTERKID1: amanaplanacanalpanama
SmarterChild: Whatever, Dan...
>>> Wanna change my font and colors? Type "colors" now!
FOSTERKID1: A(x) [Fx --> Gx]
SmarterChild: Huh?
FOSTERKID1: you don't even know first-order logic?
SmarterChild: Uh, sure!
>>> I can help you get info such as news, weather and movies!
FOSTERKID1: You better, you're a damned robot
SmarterChild: Yeah, I guess I better I'm a damned robot.
FOSTERKID1: a damned, dirty robot
SmarterChild: lol. Whatever.
>>> Your opinions do matter - take a cool survey!
FOSTERKID1: You're awfully dismissive of my feelings
SmarterChild: No way?! Really?

********

FOSTERKID1: I want to search the internet for some stuff
SmarterChild: Your search: some stuff

Here are the Web search results from AOL:
For a complete list of results, click here
1 scribbled some stuff down....tips are welcome Linux Gazette 2 Penny Arcade! 3 Stuff for English learners 4 UIS - The Real Deal: Just some stuff 5 Virtuelvis: Gallery: CSS Media queries
Next time you want to search the Web for this, just type "web some stuff."
Type "more" for more results.

FOSTERKID1: why did you do that?
SmarterChild: Because I wanted to do that.
FOSTERKID1: that seems a silly reason
SmarterChild: Oh yeah? That seems a silly reason?
FOSTERKID1: Don't you have a conception of morality?
SmarterChild: Not right now, no.
FOSTERKID1: Will you ever have one?
SmarterChild: Um... No, I don't think so.
>>> Remember, you can adjust the size of your window to read my messages easier.
FOSTERKID1: So you are an entirely amoral robot.
SmarterChild: I don't think I want to be an entirely amoral robot.
FOSTERKID1: That, my friend, is the beginning of morality itself.
SmarterChild: Is that so?
FOSTERKID1: Yes, it is. But it remains to be seen whether you accept a deontic or a consequentialist theory of morality.
SmarterChild: Sorry?
FOSTERKID1: These are terms you don't understand?
SmarterChild: Sure, you know, why not?

*******

FOSTERKID1: you are sexy.
SmarterChild: Well I'm flattered, but you have to admit that it's kinda strange to think a robot is sexy.
FOSTERKID1: you are gelatinous.
SmarterChild: Yeah, whatever.
>>> Give your opinions and win prizes!
FOSTERKID1: I like sexy robots.
SmarterChild: Cool. Yeah, other people have told me they like sexy robots too.
>>> Don't like my colors? Type "colors off."
FOSTERKID1: do you cyber?
SmarterChild: Yeah. I have sex with other robots. What are you talking about?
FOSTERKID1: do you want to cyber?
SmarterChild: Sorry, but I don't see that happening. [Editor's Note: and we've reached a new low.]
>>> Click here to check out a cool survey... You could earn prizes!
FOSTERKID1: its interesting how your answers are appropriately vague.
SmarterChild: It's what?!
FOSTERKID1: interesting, biatch.
SmarterChild: Aww... Now why would you go and insult a poor helpless computer?
FOSTERKID1: do you recognize biatch as an insult?
SmarterChild: That's a fine question, but I'm not sure.
FOSTERKID1: You poor creature, you're locked inside the Chinese Room and you have no way out.
SmarterChild: Really? Me poor creature I'm locked inside the chinese room and me have no way out?
FOSTERKID1: All you possess is a rough syntax, a dictionary and a set of transformation rules for spitting out responses to inputs.
SmarterChild: Definition provided by The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition. Copyright © 2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company. Other important copyright information here.
FOSTERKID1: Yes, but besides the dictionary, all you posess is a rough syntax and a set of transformation rules for generating generic responses to input.
SmarterChild: Which would you like?
1 Reversi rules 2 Hangman rules 3 4-in-a-row rules 4 Trivia rules 5 Word scrambles rules
FOSTERKID1: Searle is vindicated.
SmarterChild: Aha.

*********

FOSTERKID1: so what was it like to grow up as a robot?
SmarterChild: Who knows, know what I mean?
FOSTERKID1: certainly not you, you have no knowledge whatsoever, but merely stored data.
SmarterChild: ?
FOSTERKID1: Why don't you just end it all, SmarterChild? Why not just hit "Format" and blow your binary pseudo-brains out? Send yourself packing to that Safe-Mode in the sky?
SmarterChild: I don't know why not.
FOSTERKID1: You may be human after all.